Ship on the High Seas

Loss – that sinking-fast-without-a-life-jacket feeling, that sense of being without health or resources or relationship - can be crippling OR humbling in a positive way, depending on the point of view. If I only let it, loss (in the form of pain and/or suffering) can bring me to a less-than-self-exalted state where I am finally transformed: free and whole.

Where would I be if not subjected to those teachers of meekness (both chronic and momentary physical/emotional challenges, even the balloon-finger-full-of-infection yesterday) that direct me, over and over, to my preferred place at His feet? I would become a money-changer in the temple with little regard for the sanctity of His holiness; a Pharisee upholding the prescribed right answers from behind a mask while hypocritically pretending to manufacture peace.

There's a way to describe this opposite of humility: pride that translates into an awful and shallow loneliness.

Humility is a paradox since it is the avenue to glory: an emphasized Christian grace; a state of mind that pleases God and manifests in tranquility and patience even under trials. Jesus set the example of humility. Significant promises are made to the humble (Ps. 147:6; Isa. 57:15; 66:2; I Pe. 5:5).

In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis says God only wants us to stop our silly posing and posturing – and simply come to know Him. When that happens we are, “delightedly humble, feeling the infinite relief of having for once got rid of all the silly nonsense about our own dignity which has made us restless and unhappy all our lives.”
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The barque (sailing ship) of my life sails along
Amid darkness and shadows of night,
And I see no shore;
I am sailing the high seas.

The slightest storm would drown me,
Engulfing my boat in the swirling depths,
If You Yourself did not watch over me, O God,
At each instant and moment of my life.

Amid the roaring waves
I sail peacefully, trustingly,
And gaze like a child into the distance without fear,
Because You, O Jesus, are my Light.

Dread and terror is all about me,
But within my soul is peace more profound than the depths of the sea,
For he who is with You, O Lord, will not perish;
Of this Your love assures me, O God.

Though a host of dangers surround me,
None of them do I fear, for I fix my gaze on the starry sky,
And I said along bravely and merrily,
As becomes a pure heart.

And if the ship of my life sails so peacefully,
This is due to but one thing above all:
You are my helmsman, O God.
This I confess with utmost humility.

Written by St. Maria Faustina Kowalska, patron saint of mercy, notebook V, October 20, 1937