Page-Snatcher

The infamous Page-Snatcher has stolen a page from one of our favorite children’s books: The Sneetches, by Dr. Seuss.  Just as you’re reading along about the superiority of Star-Belly Sneeches over their Plain-Belly friends, and how the Star-Belly children won’t let the Plain-Belly kids in on a game of ball, there’s a sad empty spot in the storyline because of the missing page.  I recovered the missing text online, however, which reads like this:

When the Star Belly Sneetches had frankfurter roasts


Or picnics or parties or marshmallow toasts,


They never invited the Plain-Belly Sneetches


They left them out cold, in the dark of the beaches.


They kept them away. Never let them come near.


And that’s how they treated them year after year.



Then ONE day, it seems while the Plain-Belly Sneetches


Were moping and doping alone on the beaches,


Just sitting there wishing their bellies had stars,


A stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars!

The story resumes as this cocky-looking stranger shows up: Sylvester McMonkey McBean, the sly entrepreneur who would capitalize on prejudice and peer pressure and make a good profit from the Sneetches in just one day. 

Thankfully, there’s good news at the end of the story. After going through McBean’s star-on-and-star-off machine numerous times, and paying him to apply and remove belly-stars on every round, the Sneeches change – deep down, not just at the superficial star-inscribed level. Perhaps they lose track of who started with stars and who didn’t – who had them taken off, put on, taken off, and put on – or perhaps they realize they’ve been duped by McBean.  In any case, they get smart, and see each other as equals.  The final page (which is thankfully not missing) says this:

I’m quite happy to say that the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day.  The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches

And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches.

That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars

And whether they had one, or not, upon thars.

The book has a great moral.

As far as the PAGE SNATCHER…I have identified an alleged suspect.   Age two – check. Female – check.  Avid lover of books – check.  Known for tearing pages – check.   

The suspect’s older sister (age 4 as of tomorrow) originally borrowed the book from our personal home library, and says she saw the missing page at their house.  So far their Mama has yet to uncover it.  I have little hope it will be found in one piece, although the Page Snatcher may have decided to hide it behind the dresser or in a kitchen cabinet for a rainy day. This kind of stashing/hoarding of valuables is something two-year-olds seem to do - even those who have grown up.